Grace

BECOMING GRACEFUL AS WE AGE

As we get older:
Our joints bother us.
We often feel stiff and sore.
We "plop" down on chairs and sofas.
We walk heavily and more awkwardly.

We get strikingly less graceful as we age.

We take small tentative, short steps and we don't roll through our feet. We instead place them down heavily on the ground as blocks. We walk with our feet apart, shifting our weight from side to side. Our posture deteriorates as many hunch over more and more, especially those who use walkers. The lack of core strength because of sitting so much makes our bodies heavy and harder to move, particularly our legs. Our muscle stiffness makes us ungainly and awkward.

This is the natural progression for most as we age. It is the exact opposite of what is good for our body. Our joints become more vulnerable as we get older. Arthritis is so prevalent and makes joint movement painful and difficult. The last thing we need to do is become even more abrasive to our joints by being ungraceful.

With a little focus and patience and practice, we can reverse this trend and become more nimble and elegant instead. One of the most important benefits is that it reduces fall risk substantially. But we also end up enjoying moving more and we look so much better, younger and more attractive, male or female. (One of the most graceful people I know is Cary Grant. His elegance in movement made every role he played more interesting and irresistible.)

I cannot underestimate how enjoyable it is to practice being graceful. Not only does it help us navigate through the challenges of the aging process, it is actually extremely satisfying and enjoyable as well.

The fundamental element of grace is core engagement and the main reason older people are less graceful is because their core is weaker and out of shape.

The reason: We sit more. When we are seated, the core disengages and ultimately weakens. When the core is weaker, everything is harder. Especially walking.

When our core is less in use, among other things, we loose the ability to move in an integrated manner. Each movement ends up being effortful and harder than we remember it being. We assume all these things are a normal part of aging. They are only a natural part of aging if we do nothing about it. We can reverse the process in every detail.

Try this experiment with me: Walk across the room the way you usually do. Then do it again but this time, pull your belly in as you walk. You will probably notice that your body feels lighter. Your legs actually feel like they weigh much less. Of course they weigh the same amount as before, but when we engage the core, it takes stress off the working muscles. It is quite an interesting illumination.

How does ungraceful movement affect us?

Movement that is ungraceful is abrupt, sudden, abrasive and heavy:

I believe the biggest effect is the damage it does to our joints: When we move heavily and in an ungainly fashion, we put tremendous pressure on the spine, hip, knee and foot joints. Repeated jarring effects like this only serve to irritate any existing problems. As our joints become more compromised, the effects of aging grow and cause more and more problems. Walking becomes more difficult and with that our lives change with us often not being able to do the things we love doing.

We are much more likely to fall: Ungraceful movement is also movement which is less controlled. We are more at the mercy of dangerous circumstances around us. For example, someone graceful can catch themselves instead of falling when someone else bumps into them.

Becoming more graceful helps us in so many ways. When we are more graceful, our movements are smoother.

Being graceful makes walking much easier: This means that we are able to do more. No more declining invitations because of the stairs for instance.
Joints are less stressed, leading to increased health. The joints can thrive and foster a healing environment. This could mean for example that your knee function might improve so much that you no longer need to have it replaced.
Your core strengthens when you deliberately attempt to be graceful: Keeping the movement smooth requires central control. When you focus on keeping your movement graceful, you have to engage the core. You are making your abdominals stronger automatically. This has a great effect on our lives in a number of ways. For example, your balance greatly improves if your core is stronger. We also look much better when our core is engaged.

Our Ultimate Goal:

Our ultimate goal is to engage our core all the time: As we get older we care less and less about how we hold ourselves. Mostly out of necessity. We just try to get across the room safely. Our priorities change. They have to. My own purpose is to have my core engaged more and more of the time and to hold myself elegantly as much as possible, regardless of the circumstances.

We have already seen how walking is easier when our core is engaged. It also makes everything else easier. Getting into and out of a car is a good example. Pulling your belly in before doing it helps greatly. Not only making it easier but also far safer.

When our core is engaged more of the time we don't have to think so much of these things. Our body will take care of itself automatically. This comes from core conditioning. The more you practice any of these things, the more your body learns the behavior and the less you have to concentrate on it.

You know when this really pays off? When something happens without warning. Moments like someone bumping into you unexpectedly. Or hearing a loud noise behind you. Or a car honking at you. It's life's startling moments that have the highest risk of unsettling our balance and causing us to fall. When your core is engaged during those moments, you can take steps to avoid catastrophe. When it is not, we are far more at the mercy of forces outside our control.

It's all in the transitions.

Many years ago I had a wonderful dance teacher tell us that the dance is all in the transitions. In a dance, there are usually many dramatic moments, moments when the music crescendos, moments when the dancer moves dramatically. Those are often the things that make the biggest impression on an audience. The "Wow!" moments.

But, that is not were the real dance happens. It is in the transitions. And usually that means it is when you take your weight off one foot and place it on the other. How you do that is the dance. How you move from one place to another. And how we do that as older people translates into how graceful we are.

A basic element involved occurs when our weight shifts from one foot to the other and how our body handles that transition. This is true for the dancer and true for everyone walking on 2 feet. It is during that weight change that the core becomes so important. It is the factor that keeps us upright. An easy way to do this is to simply pull your belly in while you move from one to the other foot. The more that process is integrated into your motion, the more graceful you are.

A great exercise:

Practice holding your belly in continuously while taking multiple breaths. As an exercise, I like taking 4 breaths while holding my belly in. This is ideal core engagement. It really isn't a lot of effort, nor are many muscles involved. At least not as much as we imagine. It is very basic torso engagement.

Imagine being graceful:

But grace is not just in the body. It involves how we think as well. How we perceive our own motion. If we think we are awkward, then the result will likely be that we move that way. And the reverse is most definitely true.

One of my favorite "tricks" is to go to bed at night imagining moving gracefully and easily when I get up the next morning. Then, before I get out of bed, I have an image in my head about how I want to walk. I do not care whether it is realistic. I simply imagine how I would love to walk right away.

This is also a good technique for getting up off the sofa or getting into or out of an auto. Imagine ahead of time how you would like to move. This method helps the nervous system anticipate what to do and it is bound to help. It is a very good way to improve and amazingly effective.

Do not "plop": We often sit down abruptly and heavily.

Plopping is so hard on the body. It is especially jarring on the joints of the lower spine. The phenomenon bizarrely also makes getting up harder.

Here are some things that help:

Control the process all along the way. Do not stop using your core til you are seated (and hopefully not even then, see above).
Think of placing yourself down lightly as you sit.
Pull your belly in throughout the entire process.
Use your hands to help you shift your weight evenly. Either place your hands on your knees or thighs as you descend or on the chair as you arrive.
Practice "senior squats". (See below.)

How to become more graceful:

Grace comes from core engagement and awareness. Concentrate on making your movements more even and less jerky. Slow down. Think of holding yourself with pride.

The most important element by far in becoming graceful is to use your core more. Practice doing everything and anything while holding your belly in: brushing your teeth, hanging your clothes up, writing a letter, putting your shoes on.

To be graceful, you have to practice.

Think of some of the most graceful movie stars: Cary Grant, Audrey Hepburn, Denzel Washington. (There's a wonderful sequence in the Audrey Hepburn/Fred Astaire movie Funny Face where she glides down a huge cement staircase, all the while holding a red veil behind her. If that isn't the essence of grace, I don't know what would be.) All three of these actors painstakingly studied how to move gracefully. This does not usually come to people naturally. Dancers have to practice it all the time. So do models.

How do you practice being graceful? Practice, practice, practice. Do you remember practicing walking with a book on your head when you were young? Maybe we can do without the book, but the practice is essential. Practice walking, practice climbing stairs, practice being graceful as you put the dishes away.

Practice walking:

Practice rolling through your feet while staying seated as shown in the 3rd Building Better Balance video.
Pull your belly in through out the process.
Practice walking while rolling through your feet.
Practice moving your weight smoothly from one foot to the other.
Take longer strides.
Look straight ahead as you walk.
Practice as if you are moving in slow motion.
Practice walking without making sound.
If you use a walker, place your hands lightly on the handles of the walker instead of leaning on it. Bring your hips in so that the handles are on either side of your hips instead of in front of them.
Make sure your knees are softly bending and straightening. Check you knees for tension and shake it out.
Practice in a safe environment, with your hands free and a sturdy counter or railing to hold on to if need be.

Include these in your daily routine:

Strengthen your core: Do 3 sets of abdominals every day. Pull your belly in deliberately as you practice being graceful.
Senior squats: Squats are thought to be among the most useful of all exercises. Standing with your feet apart, keep your spine straight as you bend your knees and tilt your torso forward and then back up again. Don't let your knees extend farther out than your feet. A senior squat simply uses a chair as starting position. It is critical to keep your back straight throughout. Pull your abdominals in as you move. Your arms can be in various positions: out in front of you, in prayer position, on your knees.
Increase your foot agility to enable rolling through your feet as you walk. 10 minutes of foot exercises are contained in each of the 4 Building Better Balance classes, differing by DVD.

Above all, being graceful is very satisfying and pleasurable.
Endless gentle expression that has an essence all its own.
It makes being older sexy.

Helpful links:

Advice About Walking
Walk Much More Easily
How to Use Walkers and Canes
Foot Help For Those Older
The Mighty Core
Abdominals