PROFESSIONAL ADVICE THAT BACKFIRES:
What seniors really need to hear.

Most people don't really understand what it is like to be old until you become older. Some things younger people do, professionals or friends, can affect older people significantly in unintended ways. Understand the impact of what you do. Try to put yourselves in our shoes. 
  • Doctors: When we tell you about our aches and pains, please do not say "It's just because you are getting older." Instead, explain what our ailment is and enthusiastically refer us to exercise programs or other remedies that help reduce symptoms. 
  • Never say "There is nothing more I can do" or "There is nothing that can be done". These messages have a strong negative psychological impact and are also not true. There is always something that can be done about any situation. Improving breathing technique and increasing core strength are 2 possibilities that often help underlying symptoms. Of course sometimes nothing can be done about the physical progress of an illness but certainly other areas of growth are available to the patient. Spiritual for instance. The above comments close doors for those more vulnerable and frail for other reasons and are very depressing to hear. Give your patient an open window instead.
  • Physical Therapists: Please place more emphasis on helping your clients establish a regular exercise routine for continuing at home after their therapy series with you is completed. Your wonderful work is often wasted because it so difficult for patients to keep motivated. Your support helps. Follow-up communication would be wonderful. 
  • Do not teach older clients to improve their balance by practicing high-risk actions. For example, walking toe to heel, where the feet are directly in line and touching, is commonly used as an exercise to improve balance but it is a risky thing to do on your own. Supervised use of this exercise is ok, though safer and more reliable methods of balance could be taught instead. But, do not encourage older people to practice that type of exercise at home. It increases the likelihood of a fall significantly. This 
  • Senior group residences: Get your residents into more activities. It is the answer to improving your client's lives while reducing falls dramatically, but aggressive salesmanship is needed. Informing your residents about organized activities is not enough. Do not expect your residents to attend. Convince them to. People often have to be motivated personally. More staff encouragement translates into improved health for your clients.
  • Caregivers and children of older parents: Many are concerned about their parents or clients having falls. The best way to prevent falls is to exercise on a regular basis but it is often difficult to motivate others to become more active. It will work out much better if you help them by exercising along with them. Do not expect them to get started on their own. 
  • Professionals making recommendations: Make sure the recommendations for seniors that you make to the public are easy and safe enough for the elder population. For instance, a physical therapist wrote in a newspaper article that an older person could reduce their falls by standing up and sitting down 30 times in a row. It is a great exercise for strengthening the legs...but 30 times...! The senior hears this, tries it out and realizes that it is too much for them. They go away feeling older and less motivated to be active.
  • Another example from the newspaper: An article describing whether a person would be healthy in older age recommended testing yourself by sitting cross-legged on the floor and standing up without using your hands. Again the senior realizes they can't possibly do this (I can't and I'm a professional dancer) and goes away with the feeling that they are too old and that nothing can be done to change their downhill trajectory.

As recently as September, 2022, reliable sources like Kaiser Permanente were recommending that people test their balance by seeing if they could stand on one foot for 30 seconds. Another common recommendation is to place one foot directly in front of the other and see if you can maintain your balance. This type of advice often flows from the science gurus at the New York Times as well. It is wrongheaded and dangerous. Those susceptible will test themselves without assistance and put themselves at high risk for falling, with depression resulting if unable to perform these actions.

Things younger people should never do with older people:

  • Do not come up behind an older relative or friend to surprise them. They will turn their head and as a result can hurt themselves or get dizzy and disoriented. Come around to the front of the person and communicate with them directly.
  • Never call to an older person across a parking lot. It will distract them from the task at hand, walking. They may turn to look at who is calling to them and stop looking where they are going, a recipe for disaster.
  • Do not walk and talk at the same time as you are helping older adults. If you need to talk, stop, chat, and then continue walking after checking out for hazards. When a senior walks they need to use all their concentration on what they are doing.
  • Do not shake hands vigorously with an older person. Often they have arthritis in their hands and it is painful for them. 

One of the things we don't realize about until we are older is how stiff and achy we can get or how quickly walking deteriorates. Regular physical activity reduces falls exponentially. It also relieves pain and stiffness. Practice improves walking tremendously. If you want to age gracefully, take the Building Better Balance DVD classes. They will help you get strong and more flexible while improving your balance and grace.

Updated October 3, 2022.